


A Disney's guide to confess love

by BlackSmile



Category: Supernatural
Genre: And Dean is hopelessly in love with Cas, Castiel is hopelessly in love with Dean, Castiel loves Disney movies, Charlie Ships It, Dean Loves Disney, Fluffy Ending, Kinda, M/M, Princess Dean Winchester, Sam Ships It, Slow Burn, and they still are dorks, and they're both dorks, betting pool about Destiel, giant dorks, mentions of injury, some Disney references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-09 01:33:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5520446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackSmile/pseuds/BlackSmile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Castiel finally understands that he loves Dean, discoveres his passion for Disney movies and eventually gets his own (kinda) Happy-End.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Disney's guide to confess love

**Author's Note:**

> Hello dear friend!  
> This story was written as a christmas present for a friend and since I have her permission to upload it, I decided I would just do that :D It also wasn't Beta-read, so if you find any mistakes, please keep them
> 
> Kudos and maybe comments are always welcome ^^

Castiel sat on a park bench and gazed at nothing in particular. His eyes roamed over the wide lawn while taking notice of every human and animal, his consciousness collecting and saving every bit of information there was. It was something all angels did naturally, sometimes he didn’t even notice when he did it, they needed to be aware of their environment and everything within. After all angels were warriors of god, a warrior could never let his guard down, it would end in certain death.  
A pair of sky blue eyes turned towards the clouds. They were hanging low today, low and grey above earth, not even a tiny bit of blue skies in sight. Sometimes he missed heaven, after all it was his home, after all he was created there and grew up alongside his brothers and sisters. Still, the feeling humans used to refer as “homesickness” wasn’t as strong as the pull he felt to stay on earth. He didn’t knew why, but as much as he wanted to be in Heaven again, the more he wanted to stay among his father’s creations.  
A sigh escaped soft pink lips as the image of meadow green eyes came into his eyes. How could he deny it any longer? The attraction towards a human man had grown beyond what he felt for his siblings or any human. At first he’d been thickheaded about it, ignoring it, pushing it aside, but as time passed things changed and he made peace with the strange pain like feeling inside his chest.  
“You bloody love that guy, don’t you?” Another man had said after Castiel had told him his problem, back then he still referred to it as a problem. The angel had slumped his shoulders and continued to look into the brewage known as “beer”. Thinking back Castiel had no idea how he had ended up in a bar somewhere in Wales where the nice old man had listened to him and even paid for a drink.  
Now he was sure of it, he desired him. “Love” was too much of a complicated word for Castiel, too many variations, too many meanings, too much to understand wrong. Thus he called it desire. Desire for close physical contact, not the occasional shoulder pat; desire for closeness, not by means of being locked into a closet together and awkwardly avoiding each other; desire for shared intimate moments.  
The phone buzzing in his trouser pocket pulled him away from his thoughts and back to the present. He took it out and looked at it, trying to figure out whether the technologic device wanted him to communicate orally or via written messages. It turned out to be the latter.  
_Found a vamp nest, wanna join?_  
He smiled as he began writing a message back on the alphabet keys that appeared on the screen.  
_Of course Dean, I would like to join you on a hunt. Is Sam coming too? When and where am I supposed to meet you?_  
After the phone buzzed again with a response he made sure no one was watching and teleported to the place where the Winchester brothers would meet him. In five hours. So Castiel stood by the side of a bumpy forest road and waited.

Five and a half hours later the angel picked up the noise of an all too familiar car approaching. He smiled as he watched it park and his two friends step out of it. Approaching it he watched as the brothers went to the car trunk and take out all the essentials needed for a vampire hunt.  
“Heya Cas.” Dean smiled and threw him a small yet wide blade.  
Castiel caught it without a problem and came to a stop beside the vehicle. “Hello Dean.”  
“So, what have you been up to? Anything new from upstairs?”  
“I am afraid not so, the angel radio has been quiet in the last few days.”  
Sam joined them after closing the trunk. “Maybe for the better. Quiet means nothing bad is happening.”  
“You are probably right Sam, it is good to see you.” Castiel smiled. He smiled a lot since he came to term with his feelings. It felt good, better than he could have ever thought it to be.  
“Well then, who’s up for some blade testing?” Dean called, already making his way into the woods. The other two man coming after him immediately.

“Will you just hold still?” Sam hissed as he did his best to stich his brother back together. The vamp nest had been no problem at all, the three of them had handled it within a few minutes, but then that Wendigo had shown up out of nowhere and decided that Dean made a good chewing toy.  
“Fuck you, that hurts like a bitch!” snapped Dean back and gritted his teeth through the pain. It was almost laughable, really, he had been through hell and back, literally, and here he was, arguing once again with his baby brother to try and ignore the pain. Luckily the bites didn’t tear any muscles, so no lasting damage. Except maybe some scars, but what kind of hunter didn’t have any scars? Both the Winchester brothers had quite the collection.  
On the other motel bed Castiel sat and watched them with weary eyes. It pained him almost physically to see Dean injured. His screams of pain and agony still rang in the angel’s ears and he remembered the sudden, aching feeling inside his chest, as if somebody was squeezing his vessels heart. He had actually been… scared. For another man’s life. For the man’s life he desired so dearly yet never said so. “I’m sorry I can’t heal you.” Castiel said and tried to smile apologizing.  
“’s alright Cas, ‘m just glad you didn’t get hurt.” Dean slurred a little, as if his tongue was just a little bit too heavy to be moved properly in order to speak. Castiel took this as a sign that the ridiculous amount of painkillers Dean had taken prior finally kicked in.  
The angel just nodded. He had thought many times about admitting his feelings to Dean, just like he did now. Only three little words that somehow meant so much. Castiel once again was overwhelmed by the complexity of mankind. And once again he felt ashamed for their incredible narrow views. Angels were sexless, celestial beings, they just were, it was pure coincidence his vessel was male. And apparently a man desiring another man was still seen as sin. Castiel didn’t understand that concept. So many great men in earth’s history had desired other men, yet so many people denied that fact. Why was it, that mankind couldn’t let other people be with whom they desired?  
With a sad glint in his eyes Castiel watched Dean lay down with a few hisses of pain. Sam had finished stitching his wounds and covered them in neat white bandages. They covered too much of Deans beautiful freckled shoulders and back. Castiel didn’t understand why the man was so embarrassed about the freckles; he said that was something only five year old girls in cute little dresses were supposed to have. However Castiel admired them whenever he caught a glimpse of them, they reminded him of stars in the nighttime sky. Once he had heard people referring to freckles as _Angel kisses_ ; Castiel found it amusing, no angel had ever kissed Dean.  
He knew Dean would reject him. He desired women and women alone. The idea and a man desiring another man was grotesque for him and Castiel truly felt sorry for him. He wished to show him how natural and beautiful it could be, but Dean was no man for desire lasting longer than a night. Especially not with men.  
Thus Castiel just sat there and watched the righteous man sleep and uneasy sleep, stricken with nightmares and pain and wished nothing more than to take it all away.

The bunker was a nice place. Castiel had always liked it, since he’d first been inside it, a warm feeling seeped through him every time he entered it. He supposed it was mostly because of the Winchester brothers this place made him yearn for heaven as it had been while he was growing up. _Home_. Another word like this, just a simple word but somehow it meant so much, other words couldn’t describe it.  
Castiel tilted his head slightly and returned his focus on the television screen in front of him. He believed it was one of the so called “Disney movies”. It was the third one in a row and somehow Castiel couldn’t bring himself to stop watching. They were nice movies, he caught himself smiling then and now. For some reason they had earned the reputation of only being seen by little girls. Castiel didn’t understand that, all of these movies taught important lessons and were generally really great to watch.  
A nock on the door made him lose the focus on the story. “Yes?” He called, by now pretty sure it was the normal response to someone knocking on the door and willing to let them in.  
“Hey Cas, Sammy’s making pancakes, you want some?” Dean leaned in the now half open door. His grin turned into a frown when he caught a glimpse of the television screen. “Dude, are you watching _The jungle book_?”  
“I believe it was the title they showed at the beginning of the movie, yes.”  
Dean frowned at the screen a little longer, than snapped out of it as if he had been hypnotized by the singing snake as well. “Whatever, I’m gonna keep you some pancakes warm in the oven, alright?”  
“Alright, thank you Dean.” Castiel smiled and three little words sat on the tip of his tongue but wouldn’t come out.

Somehow Castiel sitting alone in his room watching one Disney movie after the other had turned into the male equivalent of a slumber party. At least Dean insisted on calling it like that. The truth was all three men slumped on something fluffy near the television, the occasional crunch of chips or the slurp of beer and a whole load of Disney Movies.  
“Her eyes look like yours, Dean.” Castiel suddenly said somewhere towards the end of _Rapunzel_.  
There was a sound of Sam chocking on his beer somewhere in the background while Deans cheek obviously took on a light shade of red. “The hell dude?”  
Castiel looked at him, not a hint of a joke on his face. “Did I say something wrong?”  
Dean hesitated. “Look Cas, you can’t just compare men to some under aged Disney chick.” He tried to explain. Tried. Castiel still looked puzzled.  
“I thought her eyes were pretty and they reminded me of yours.”  
“Then did you have to say it?”  
“I just thought…” Suddenly Castiel felt flustered and looked back to the television, not daring to say any more.  
Silence stretched again, but this time uncomfortable tension filled the air and everyone felt it. Soon enough Dean left the room without a word or look. Sam followed soon after, smiling awkwardly and wishing Castiel a good night.

The weeks dragged on without any major incidents. A few salt-and-burn’s, a few werewolves, a woman in white and that flesh-eating worm nobody had a name for. Castiel tagged along most of the time, helping out with everything he could (he had actually had the honor of dropping the matches into a grave belonging to a particular destructive ghost) and rewarding himself with another Disney movie once back at the bunker.  
It was funny, really, the more he watched the more he liked the movies. Some of them he had seen two or three times. A curious thing he realized soon however was the fact that there were no proposes. The couples were just married at one point.  
It really bothered him, so he looked it up on the world wide communication device known as Internet. Immediately he was basically flooded by thousands of pictures and videos, always a male and a female. The male one was kneeling with a small box in his hand while the female was always crying or at least very close to tears. On closer inspection the box held a ring, always a spectacular fancy one with diamonds or other gems. Engagement ring, he later learned, it was called and they were unnecessary expensive. He didn’t understand why this was deemed necessary, other things would be far more personal and precious to the person receiving the ring. A handcrafted ring maybe, or something that meant something to both of them, connecting them.  
Without realizing his thoughts drifted to the kind of ring Dean would like. Nothing fancy like he’d seen in some pictures, that’s for sure. A simple, decent ring, maybe with an engraving. And before noticing he was actually toying with the idea to get a ring for Dean. Of course proposing would be a bad idea. Dean had no idea of his desire, he surely wouldn’t know how to react and when Dean didn’t know how to react he tended to just leave. Castiel had seen photographs and videos of men left alone after proposing. They had made him sad, the look in these men’s eyes made him realize how their whole worlds shattered within a matter of seconds. Maybe he was being selfish, but he didn’t want to be one of these men.  
Voices from somewhere in the bunker made him look up and smile. Sam and Dean had returned from a hunt. Castiel stood up and made his way towards the main room where he knew the brothers would always stop after a hunt. This time however a furious looking Dean stomped past him, muttering something under his breath that certainly wasn’t a greeting.  
“Dean, what’s-“ Castiel wanted to ask, but was interrupted by the sound of a door slamming shut. Dean had reached his room.  
“Don’t bother, we ran into a witch. You know how he is with witches…” Sam just shrugged as he walked past the angel.  
“Is he hurt?” Castiel found himself asking immediately.  
“No, not a scratch on either of us, thanks for asking.” Sam snorted and disappeared into his own room.  
Castiel was left standing alone in the hallway. He supposed the hunt didn’t go well. It was a natural human reaction to be frustrated and angry when things didn’t go as planned. For a moment he stood there, pondering whether to go back into his room or try to cheer Dean up.  
Finally deciding for the latter he went down the hall until he stood in front of the other man’s room and knocked carefully. “Dean?” he called, just loud enough for the addressed to hear.  
There was no response, but Castiel could hear Dean moving around inside the room. Determined not to give up, Castiel knocked again, louder this time. “Dean? Dean, can I come in?” He waited patiently, yet there still was no answer. “Dean, I can hear you in there, I just want to talk to you.”  
“Oh yeah, about what?” The answer came without missing a beat.  
“I… about the hunt. It didn’t seem to have gone well. And that leaves you frustrated and angry, I understand that, it is the natural human reaction to failure.” He hesitated. “However talking to a friend will help you to get rid of these negative emotions and-“  
The door was pulled open with more force than necessary. “Cas! Just shut your face and leave me alone!” And before the angel could respond it was slammed shut again.  
For a few moments Castiel stood there, stunned and thinking about a proper reaction to this situation. When none came to his mind he simply returned to his own room. It hurt him, every time Dean snapped at him like that. It didn’t happen often, luckily, but the sensation in his chest was similar to the one he felt whenever Dean was hurt. _Sadness_. His consciousness corrected him. Yes, sadness seemed like a fitting word, sadness and hurt. It hurt him when Dean was hurt and it hurt him when Dean was deliberately throwing such words at him. He tried not to feel hurt, but it just seemed to be something so _human_.  
With a sigh he sat down on his bed and looked to the television. A paused scene from a new Disney Movie still waited there for him, frozen in the moment. Suddenly and idea formed in his head and Castiel went back to Deans door. He knocked a few times.  
“Dean? Do you want to build a snowman?”  
There was an unidentifiable noise behind the door and a moment of silence, before Dean answered. “What the hell dude? It’s frickin’ May!”  
“We could go to Greenland, there’s always snow there. Funny, isn’t it? How they called a land permanently covered in snow Greenland. Maybe it was just a joke but somebody didn’t get it, like I don’t get why the pizza man had handcuffs with him while-“  
The door was pulled open and suddenly Castiel found himself with the back to the wall.  
“Alright Cas, just what the hell is wrong with you?” Dean certainly wasn’t in a good mood.  
“I wanted to cheer you up, you seemed to be very frustrated about the bad hunt.”  
“You don’t cheer somebody up just by quoting _Frozen_.” Dean groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. That soft, soft hair Castiel would love to caress…  
“I am sorry Dean, this certainly wasn’t my intention.” Castiel mumbled. And then, within a quarter of a second he made a decision. Not quite knowing why and how he wrapped his arms around Dean and pressed his lips on the other man’s.  
Too hard, he would later learn, kisses, especially first ones, were supposed to be soft, tender. And tilting the head seemed to be another key point he wasn’t aware of yet, their noses were in the way.

The main door slamming shut brought Castiel fully back to reality. Well, so much for romantic first kisses… His eyes wandered to where Dean had just stormed off and out of sight, probably for the next few days.  
He still stood there when Sam emerged from his own room, looking surprised. “Might I ask what just happened?”  
“I think I made Dean angry.”  
Sam made a pained noise. “Really, Cas? You knew he was already pissed from the hunt, no need to rub salt into the wound.”  
“I kissed him.”  
For once there was nothing for Sam to choke on, so he just made a surprised face, quickly replaced by a look of annoyance. “Seriously? I owe Charlie fifty bucks now!”  
Castiel tilted his head. “Why?”  
The look of annoyance didn’t fade, it was now accompanied by disapproval and Sam just walked past him to the kitchen. Castiel was almost sure he heard him laughing over the sound of the coffee machine.  
Despite the expectations, Dean returned after only two days. Neither Sam nor Castiel had heard him enter; he just suddenly stood in the main room, his clothes a little bit too dirty to still be worn, his hair a little bit too greasy to have been washed the previous days. He seemed uncomfortable, looking on the ground in front of his feet, hands tucked deep into his jackets pockets.  
Sam was the first to react; he stood up and approached his brother slowly. “Dean, are you alright?”  
There was just a nod for an answer and a little shuffle of the feet as Sam got too close. The younger one stood there for a moment, before getting the silent message his older brother sent him.  
“Oh yes, I completely forgot, there was this… thing I want to… check. You know.” With a nod and an assuring smile Sam left the room. Dean let a small sigh out as soon as he disappeared behind a wall.  
“Dean?” In the meantime Castiel had stood up and now was the one to approach him. Again Dean shuffled a little when he got too close for comfort. Immediately Castiel took a step back. “I’m sorry for what happened. I didn’t mean to scare you.”  
For a few heartbeats there was silence, then Dean slightly tilted his head from one side to the other, not breaking eye contact with the floor in front of his feet. “You didn’t scare me.”  
“Did I make you angry?” Castiel asked anxiously. When Dean built these walls around him, it was impossible to read him.  
“No.”  
“Then please tell me, because I really don’t know.” Taking a slow step towards him Castiel carefully reached out and took hold of his sleeve, almost relieved that he didn’t pull away.  
Once again silence spread until Dean lifted his head with insecurity in his eyes. He bit his lower lip, staring over Castiels shoulder. “I thought this over many times and I still don’t know what to say.” His words were chosen carefully, each one followed by a small silence.  
Castiel felt a strange stirring his in stomach. Anxiety, fear? It made him swallow as it suddenly felt as if there was something in his throat. The grip around Deans sleeve tightened. “You don’t have to-“  
“Yes I do!” Dean snapped and turned around, running his hands through his hair. He inhaled deeply before turning around again. This time there was determination in his eyes and his fists were clenched. He exhaled and relaxed a little. “I-“ He breathed a little. “I was raised to never ask questions and just accept things as they were. That’s  
what my father taught me and never let me forget.”  
“Dean, your father never meant to-“  
“I don’t give a fuck about what my father meant to do and what he didn’t! He was a repulsive liar and didn’t give a fuck about his sons! I am done with him so just stop mentioning him!” Dean grabbed a chair and shoved it across the room. It squeaked and came to halt in front of a self.  
Castiel flinched slightly. “I am sorry Dean, I won’t mention him again.”  
“’s okay, Cas. Sorry about that…” Once again Dean bit his lower lip. “Just forget that, that was idiotic.” He continued after a few seconds. “Basically what I was trying to say is that all my life I thought I was only attracted to women. It felt good, it felt _righ_ t. Nobody complained and so I kept going like that. And then you come walking into my life just like that. And you stayed, through all that shit that my life is, you just stayed.” Dean looked back to his feet and licked his lips. “And I’m sorry for being selfish here, but I feel like I have the right to be selfish every now and then. So you stayed and you became a part of this crazy, fucked up family. That’s what I told myself. Until I realized there might be more.” His voice was trembling by now and he ran a hand over his mouth. “And it scared me. Oh god, you couldn’t imagine how it scared me! Because all my life it was women and just women and then suddenly there was you and there was this frickin’ huge part of me that didn’t want to accept that. So I thought I’m just gonna ignore it, worked out just fine all my life. Except for you, of course except for you. It didn’t leave me alone, not a single day. And when I realized that, I was _terrified_. Terrified and scared and frightened and I…” He sobbed now, blinking away tears.  
Castiel felt a pain in his heart, cold and burning at the same time, the sensation slowly spreading through his body. He wanted to hold Dean, just hold him until it was all better. Yet he knew the other man well enough to know that he wasn’t finished talking and until he was finished talking, Dean was not ready for other kinds of interactions.  
“When you kissed me, it all suddenly made so much sense. And it felt so… _right_. I ran away because I realized it wasn’t just me. It was both of us, dancing around it and avoiding it when it all was _right there_.” Carefully he reached out and taking Castiels hands. “So here I am; and I don’t care how stupid and cliché it might sound. Here I am and I fell head over heels for an angel.” Tears were running down his cheeks, but there was a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.  
Castiel just stood there, mouth slightly open and head tilted to the right. “I… I don’t know a proper way on how to respond to that. I am sorry, Dean.”  
Dean huffed before snickering. “Luckily I do.” And with these words he pulled the angel into his arms and kissed him. Just the right pressure, their heads tilted and it felt _perfect_.

 

 

 

It was as if the whole of heaven, earth and hell let out a relieved sigh.  
_Finally._

 


End file.
